Back to School

It’s been a while since our school had a “Back to School Night,” wherein we normally invite parents to visit the school, along with their child(ren), to see how the school operates. Most teachers do not attend this gathering, save the 6th grade teachers who do so because their students are new to the school. On this night we give parents to opportunity to see how this new Middle Level school operates — it’s markedly different from the elementary level.

But I’ve been thinking lately about inviting all parents for another “Back to School Night,” and this time I’d like to sit them down and have a conversation about education and what they expect for their children.

This idea came from a recent parent-teacher conference, followed a few weeks later by a teacher work day where my work was interrupted by a number of students tried to find a way to squeak in a few assignments before the end of the quarter (or where a few parents brought their child(ren) in to discuss their grades and to get work for the prior quarter).

It was because of these meetings and interruptions I’d like to sit down with all of my students’ parents and say this:

We are teachers, and we teach public school. Your child has the right to a free and adequate education, and we’ll never deny your child or any child that opportunity.

We are part of your state, city, and neighborhood, and we agree that you child should have the best education possible. We are nothing without education, and we believe that our education is something which can never be taken from us, no matter what difficulties arise. As a matter of fact, those difficulties we encounter are generally bypassed using the knowledge we acquired through schooling. We learn to think, to analyze, to dissolve difficulties into subsets and to deal with parts of a problem when the overall enshrouds us. We learn from our mistakes in order to deal with these difficulties, and we learn to categorize our problems.

In a sense, we look at every challenge we meet as collapsible. We learn to break apart the large into its pieces, as you might a machine, to see how it works. To see how we might deal with the problem, or how we might use it in reference elsewhere. And we do it every day of every school year.

For us teachers, those problems arise from “What Needs to be Learned,” and from “What Should be Taught.” And we throw in a little “Current Information,” and “Necessary Knowledge” alongside. We take your children not as problems, but as opportunities. We work to ensure your child or children walk into our environment eager, and we hope to send them off as ready.

But we’re not in this business alone. We require you be a part of this process.

We don’t think of school in the same way our students think of school. As a matter of fact, we don’t think of school the same way we did when we were students ourselves, and this has nothing to do with career or salary or even clientele — it has to do with the nature of our work. We are educators and we need to educate our society.

We teachers have become too reliant on pay.
We teachers have become too reliant on standards.
Too reliant on numbers and too reliant on treating your child(ren) as part of a subset of a subset of a subset.
And we’ve become overly reliant on the useless adage of “If I reach only one student…”

We want you to know that we ourselves, at times, see our work as useless, and that we cannot perform to specific standards. You hear the same information we do, and get it from the same sources we do. The state board of education tells you we fail as teachers. The newspaper tells you we fail as teachers. The television tells you we fail as teachers, and most people (including you parents) begin to believe this. How could you not?

And then we teachers begin our own cycle, especially when we meet the parents who show up to school on our conference nights: We see parents upset over their child’s grades. We talk with those parents and they chastise their children, and incidentally turn the schoolwork into a punishment. We talk with parents who yell at their kids, and then walk away saying: “At least you don’t have an F,” or (even worse) “I never understood [whatever subject] anyway.” We teachers mainly see those parents who meet us only to compare themselves with their children.

We also see parents who are only interested in these “Back to School Night”s as a means to childcare — they ask us: “When does the school open?” “When does the school close?” “What times do you offer meals?” “Do you have lockers to keep my [child's] items safe?” “Do you provide showers?” “What after school activities do you offer?”

These types of parents concern us because their view of the education system defies the core idea of education — that people come to a place to learn. That there is a place, within your community, that offers knowledge for free. That the people who work within that building are willing to do so, even if it requires their free time, their weekends, their email and phone lines, and their personality (because we’re often asked by administration to be upstanding members of the community, even when we’re on a weekend and out of town).

We want to teach you parents a few things at this “Back to School Night,” because that’s what we do. We inform.

We’d like first to congratulate you for showing. We understand you have your own work, your own families, and your own free time, and we respect that you’ve come to listen to a few ideas we’d like to share.

First, we’d like to dismiss everything else we said.

That’s right. We’re starting anew. Starting fresh.

We want to create an environment of learning and of acceptance, and we need you to participate. In order for your child to succeed, we need to work together. Yes, your taxes pay for our your child(ren)’s education, and as such, you need to be a part of it. Our plan includes you.

1. We respect the state standards for education. We know them by heart. We know what you child is to be taught and we plan to teach it. At each grade level we expect to revisit prior grades’ information, and we expect to teach new information. We do understand, however, that all new information will not become concrete within your student. However, we work to ensure each student learns these new ideas, can restate these ideas, and can implement these ideas in a real world setting.

2. You as a parent should be aware of these ideas and should speak to your child every night (and not on a passing, “What’d you do in school today?” level) about what he/she has learned. Use this as an opportunity for discussion — sit down with your child to discuss what was learned, what your understanding of the topic was/is, and take the time to discuss the differences between your understanding and your child’s understanding. Use this as an opportunity for learning, and as an occasion to seek out other information.

(Personal agenda: I can see nothing more important in a parent/child educational relationship than to pass on the idea that more information should be sought out. If you don’t know what’s being taught, ask your child to help you. If you know more than what was taught, take the moment to explain further than the instruction given in school. If you and your child disagree, find a way to settle the argument.)

3. You, as a parent, should never use school as a punishment: If your child does not attend to his/her work, you should let that problem itself become a consequence. Do not assign extra work. Do not ask the teacher for extra or late work. Teach your child about consequences by letting the education system take course. If a student fails a grade, let hum/her fall back.

4. When you talk to your child(ren) about assignments, you should not address it as: “That was only worth 15 points. Why didn’t you do it?” You should address it as a learning point. We teachers do not have a guideline for work and for weight. The point system is arbitrary — we give points to a student via the assignments. Ultimately the points mean nothing. They are a way of measuring what your child has accomplished. When you treat those assignments as points, you tell the student that the work is meaningless. When you treat the work as meaningless, you devalue your child’s education. Take the time to find out about the assignment and take your own time to discuss with your child the reasons behind his/her failure to do or to understand the assignment.

5. Again, take the time to talk about your child(ren)’s education. The more you play an active part in a student’s education, the more impact you will have in his/her acceptance in the idea that education is what is made of it. Don’t complain, and don’t compare. Take time to sit down and have a productive and meaningful discussion about the work, and try to find ways to complete and understand that work.

6. Understand that you are the most meaningful aspect of your child’s education. Whether your own educational goals are below or beyond the goals you have for your children is meaningless. The only goal you should have in mind is whether you want your child to be better off or worse off than yourself.